for once and for all let me make this clear!

Wow what a responds I've got when I liked Jwoww her status on facebook while she said: "How can people enjoy this shit?" "Pregnancy and I don't mix" A lot of reactions I've got from friends and family: what was wrong with me and that I must be happy having a baby because some people just can't. Well let me make things clear: Ofcourse I'm happy having a baby. No I'm not regret it that I am pregnant. Ofcourse there are people who can't get pregnant and will. And ofcourse I really want that they can be pregnant also. But can I enjoy this? Well sometimes, but sometimes don't. And I think all pregnant woman think about this. And I also think that every woman is different and experience things differently. So what one can enjoy does not mean that I can enjoy it. Normally I'm a very busy girl. I love to go to work, hang out with my friends and my hubby, make long walks with the dogs, I love to work out, I love food! If you say to me: you need some rest and can go to work and must stay at home. Well then there will something explode in my head and makes me go crazy. My life was a really rollercoaster with a lots of ups and downs. More downs then ups. So I was really hoping that for once this can be good and I can enjoy it and that everything goes normal. Well it does not. Maybe one person can handle this, but I can't. So simple is that. My life was a pretty mess and for once everything goes fine and I really want to enjoy this. But being sick, getting rest does not work well for me. Ofcours I'm happy that the baby is ok, but my mind is going insane. Maybe it's the hormones, maybe it's just me being negative again. But I will be glad that or: I can work again (maybe for a couple of hours) or that it will be Juli soon and I can get my baby in to my arms. So there is nothing that I mean that I don't wanted this baby, or that I'm not ready for it... It is an accumulation of many things, mostly my past. I want to look in to the future but sometimes you just can't. And really: It's not that I always feel down with it, I have my moments. And this week it's one of them. And I won't feel good if people say: "But it's for a good cause." I know what I'm doing it for and people don't have to say that every time when I feel crap. I know it could be more worse then this. But like I said there are more things in my mind then only how I feel right now. I hope now you can a little bit understand me and why I'm feeling it this way. I've read an article also yesterday on Pregnancy Corner. And I really liked also what it said. A good text to close this blog for today! "As I was laying in my bed last night, not being able to sleep thanks to stomach aches, extreme back pain and the baby having a party in my tummy I remember something I said to my sister while she was pregnant. I said to her "you are not sick, you are just pregnant!" At that time I was ignorant and couldn't understand what she was going through. Growing a baby is not an easy process. You experience numerous physical and emotional changes. Not only do you have to deal with nausea, constipation, headaches, tiredness, back pains, nose bleeds, weight gain, your body changes, not being able to eat or drink certain things, but also hormonal changes. We also experience feelings of fear, insecurities, depression and the constant worry of thinking if everything will be okay. So if one of your relatives, spouse, friend is pregnant make sure to express to her that you care. Ask her how she's feeling, give her a compliment, tell her she looks beautiful, invite her to eat, ask her if you can help with anything, show her that you love her. She will really appreciate it, now more than ever!"